If you and your partner don't already share what kind of fantasies you each have, Brim explains why you should start ASAP. If all that now sounds like a distant memory and you want it back, it's a lot easier than you think. Remember to keep asking each other questions, also.
It's all about going back to the basics. You see each other for who you really are and your love is more authentic than ever before. You're also breaking down a barrier between you and entering a new level where you support each other's sexual curiosities. If you and your partner don't already share what kind of fantasies you each have, Brim explains why you should start ASAP. You're seeing a side of them that's unfamiliar, so keeping that freshness in how you see them is really important. But if you've noticed that your sex life has simmered down a little more than you'd like, luckily, it doesn't take much to kick things back into gear. But sex eventually seems more like a chore when it shouldn't. And that means talking to them about sex, talking about what you want to experience with each other, sharing fantasies. If all that now sounds like a distant memory and you want it back, it's a lot easier than you think. Seeing them in that different light will inevitably stir up some kind of response in you. The example Brim used was say you're heading off to a wedding, and they come downstairs in a tux or a dress that they rarely ever wear. First and foremost, let me just say that the end of that fire-hot period you once experienced is not a negative reflection of you and your SO's current state. Remember when you and your partner couldn't keep your hands off each other? Think about it, the longer you're with someone, the more things start to go unsaid. And that's when you and your partner need to step in before it completely goes off the wayside. Humans are so infinitely complex in every way and that includes sexually, so just keep discovering new things. Find out what turns him or her on most, what's something they've always wanted to do to you that you haven't yet done, etc. Start here and see where your sex life goes. It was more necessary to share what worked and what didn't in the bedroom when you first started dating because sex with one another was still new. When we talk about sex, we get aroused, and I think it's one of the best ways to keep that energy flowing is to talk about that over dinner and to keep discovering new things about each other sexually and that brings the novelty - you don't have to be buying a new sex toy or trying a new position. In fact, moving on from that stage can be a good indication that you've entered a period of deeper intimacy. You'd fit in quickies when you could because waiting any longer was unbearable, and you couldn't imagine the honeymoon phase ever fizzling out? Similarly, playing out various fantasies you both may have will have the same effect. Remember to keep asking each other questions, also.
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