Hello, Stranger A friend and her husband often use role-play to get in the mood. Working out gives you a sense of pride and accomplishment, says Berman. Add a few thrills.

No wonder we're not in the mood — we're tired! When you're relaxed and feeling good about yourself, sex will start to seem within the realm of possibility again. It also gets you in the mood by reducing stress and boosting your self-esteem. There is no one ideal. The brain is the biggest sex organ, so why not give it some fresh material? You used to have so much fun in bed, but suddenly your sex life just isn't what it used to be. Maybe it's after you finish a long run — your blood is pumping and you're relaxed and exhilarated. But you both deserve better. The excitement, even the passion, are MIA. What new location or position or sex toy or technique would you like to try? And you love your partner. You know it's good to escape — from work, the kids, the dust bunnies — and concentrate on each other. Tell him how to turn you on. Get undressed, dim the lights and take turns exploring each other's bodies. Go on the Prowl Make a regular date night extra exciting by letting your inner bad girl run the show. Turn chores into foreplay. Add a few thrills. Inject some imaginative and goofy play into your lovemaking routine by following these tips from real North Shore women — all of whom have sworn me to secrecy about their identities. Friendly Competition Games are fun, especially when something exciting is at stake. The same is true in the bedroom — especially if you and your partner have been together for a while and sex has become automatic. Get a bikini wax and a manicure in a deep, vampy shade. Seeing him in a place that doesn't have anything to do with you will reveal a different side of him and reconnect you with the person you fell in love with. Challenge your guy to a heart-pounding activity like rock climbing or white-water rafting. As a result, your libido takes a nosedive. The secret to the best sex ever It's extreme, yes, but highly effective. A recent study at the University of Virginia found that the leading predictor of a woman's marital happiness was the level of her husband's emotional engagement.

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