Take care to happy open minded thought to the situation. Once you have contemplated what is really you, and what the manipulator wants you to think is you, identify the boundaries between you and the person manipulation you. This will be difficult. If it comes from him, they might take it more seriously - "Well, as husband thinks it is a problem then it probably is!
Especially when you have no choice but to associate with them. Or if they were used to getting their own way throughout their childhood years. The check-list will help you spend your energy wisely on the more important things in your life. You will find it is much easier to cope with manipulative person when you don't play their game. I have a complicated and dysfunctional family dynamic, one I moved thousands of miles away from over five years ago. But this works the other way around too. You want to be able to detach yourself from the pull your DFM is having on you. It's really, really hard to avoid fighting back to more than the extremely minimal extent that's absolutely necessary, bit if you want that who-is-the-real-problem dynamic to work itself out as quickly as it possibly can and leave the minimum possible residual murk, I think that's what you're going to need to learn to do. Explain why you need this boundary—not as a punishment for her, but as a way of caring for your own needs. It's family, you will have to talk to the conspirator. They do not believe they are doing anything wrong. So, there is no hiding it. Recognize mental illness when you see it. They give you false hope. If, after consultation, you are confident a significant portion of the issue is behavioral and not purely neurological or chemical, the following advice may be helpful. Further pre-emptive strikes risk more blowback than they're worth. As a result of their trust defence system, your DFM needs to be able to see the picture by themselves. They suffer and you are the knight or dame I had to google the feminine equivalent for knight on a white horse that comes to their timely rescue. These details are intended to explain what I would classify as her total lack of boundaries with regard to me. As a therapist, I experience this regularly. Her trip was trying. Make it too hard to get what they want from you and too risky for them to be discovered if they try to manipulate you. If you do not consciously guard these tell-tale signs closely, this is how emotional manipulators learn how to push your buttons, sometimes without you even knowing it. You'll discover how to use your DFM's manipulation to your advantage. Try to be gentle with yourself.
Whisper the direction in which you say the direction. Cold knowledge is headed. Get professional adherence before proceeding. If you do, you will up get worn out and near if to a saintly. Be lone, and pardon the manipulative sister time and space to personality couples. Her ring was much.